Welcome. Not much to explain on this one. I think the title says everything. So do feel free to read on, deeper into the mind of a cynical bastard. Or do what you morons do best look away from the truth. The truth today being: Ozzy Osbourne is a Deluded Fuck.
Now I know John isn't ever fully conscious or fully aware of his surroundings and is thus not able to defend himself due the acid and pot being an actual part of his anatomy now, but I feel I must boast of the ridiculousness of his existence.
It really comes down to the facts: People that don't deserve to breathe oxygen fall under a few categories. A few of which include; people who are on "reality" TV, people who are constantly intoxicated, and people who bite the heads off animals. With these facts present, it's obvious that people such as Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie and Ozzy shouldn't be alive today. If you haven't caught my drift, I mean to say I hope Ozzy chokes on a dooby, as his existence is meaningless. And now, over a decade later he's making music once again. And by music I mean whiny emo bullshit that makes me want to cut out my scrotum and shove the pieces in my ears. With catchy lyrics such as, "I'm not going away" "Why don't they ever listen to me" and "I don't wanna live in yesterday, cross my hear until I die." Please... for the love of god quit encouraging him! Not that Ozzy's lyrics were ever that great, but now the black makeup around his eyes has a meaning.. But enough about whiny brats, let's continue on.
Next I come to an issue very similar to whiny little children, and is of equal annoyance. Bikers. If you're unsure as to what I mean, please join me on Wednesdays when a plethora of spandex-wearing anorexic douche-bags proceed to irritate every driver outside of my workplace on a fairly busy(car-wise, and now bike-wise) street. No need to obey the laws of the road sir! Or at the very least have some moral disposition to bring yourself to the conclusion that you might be pissing EVERYONE off that has more than 2 wheels on their mode of transportation.
Secondly, what is with the outfit!? You are incapable of going the set speed limit of 35mph, so why strap yourself in a skin-tight one-piece wet suit that grabs your testiculars for all the world to see? Your paper framed bike, spandex nighty, and "streamline" helmet are gonna get you what? Maybe; 12 miles an hour total? Woop-dee-fucking-doo sir! I still have to slam on my breaks in an attempt to scare you shitless which is an attempt to see if you will magically pedal for your life and thus get up to 30 miles an hour; a speed low enough to still piss me off, yet fast enough for me to not cut out your very large and noticeable ball-sack. So why not go with some shorts and a T-shirt? I don't know.. I have an IQ greater than that of Mr. Osbourne, so I am incapable of thinking like an idiot.
That's all for now, I'm too pissed off to not kill someone. My girlfriend is here, and she'd kill me if I killed her. I will go, so as to see the light of the sun for another day(which also irritates me to no end, why the hell is that thing so bright!?)
Later days
About Me
- Lantz M
- I have this special talent; I am able to sing better than anyone else in the world, but only when in a car by myself with speakers blaring. I also stopped a man from eating a raisin-bran muffin once, as I was pretty sure he would choke on it--That's right, ladies. I save lives.
I'm a little bit sarcastic at times. I like to give and take laughs, smiling and laughter is pretty neato. I think friends would say I'm very open minded, maybe to a fault. I love rain; the look of the clouds and the smell of the wet ground is great. But I also love the sun as it allows me to ride the bike around. I recently discovered I'm claustrophobic, that's as close to "a fear of mine" that I can think of. I love to travel, but lately work has held me back from that. My friends and family are quite amazing and I really like spending time with them.
I'm a nut when it comes to music. The amount of music I like is a bit ridiculous, but I get bored easily so I need to hear something different all the time. Every musician has different stories, sounds and emotions to share.
